TO LIVE I MUST DIE
In my active addiction, I had great difficulty with the word surrender. My ego was attached to a persona of who I used to be. As a soldier, I was trained to fight, endure, and never surrender. Addiction is a different kind of war. It is a struggle that can’t be won through willpower or […]
Remembering
9/11/2025 I am aware it is suicide prevention month and I am attempting to figure out how to address that in a subsequent blog post. I’ve already received some prodding on why I have not made a post about that. More later. Today, I cannot help but reflect on this date in time. The anniversary […]
GREATER THAN MYSELF
GREATER THAN MYSELF I joined the Army to be a part of the noblest cause – duty, honor, country. I sought purpose, structure, and the challenge of being a warrior. Serving in the 82nd Airborne Division fulfilled that calling. As an Airborne Infantryman, I discovered the kind of brotherhood forged only through sweat, sacrifice, and […]
Having what you want
I showed up to Warriors Heart Lodge broken angry and hungover in September of 2023, I couldn’t even make it three days between an inpatient rehab and my flight to Texas without drinking. When I got to the lodge there was another warrior who was just happy all the time and I hated him for […]
CALL TO ACTION 2025
2025 CALL TO ACTION Warrior definition: ‘A person engaged or experienced in warfare. Broadly: A person engaged in a struggle or conflict.’ Recovery definition: ‘The process of combating a disorder (such as alcoholism) or a real or perceived problem.’ I am Michael O’Connor, an honorably discharged combat veteran of the 2/505 Parachute Infantry Regiment, 82nd […]
Will it be easy? Nope! Worth It? Absolutely.
13 December 2024 Nothing worth doing comes easy “Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty… I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life. I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well.” -Theodore […]
Powerlessness and Control
18 November, 2024 Recovery is a full contact sport, Part II Powerlessness and Control “…To gain power is to be increasingly powerless” – Olivia Blake Who wants to admit they are powerless? Isn’t nature in its purest sense about gaining power? The alpha male wolf of the pack? Isn’t human society built on power and […]
Recovery is a full contact sport.
14 November, 2024 Recovery is a full contact sport. I have misconceptions and expectations about everything. This is not new for me, it’s how I have been since I can remember. I consider myself fairly experienced in life and moderately well read. I learned little from my past experiences and less from the libraries of […]
WARRIORS PROMISE
WARRIORS PROMISE Definition Warrior: “A person engaged or experienced in warfare.” “A person engaged in some struggle or conflict.” Definition Promise: “A declaration that one will do or refrain from doing something specified.” especially “ground for the expectation of success, improvement, or excellence.” The struggle of alcoholism and addiction and how it affects us as […]
A Warrior Called
October 19th 2024 A Warrior Called The other night a fellow warrior, a retired gunny sergeant and fellow alcoholic reached out through our recovery chat and wanted to talk. He wanted to talk about Ramadi, Iraq. We both were deployed there in 2005-2006 when Time Magazine labeled it as the “most dangerous place on Earth.” […]