In active addiction, I lost everything for one thing. In sober recovery, I have everything for losing one thing. I didn’t make that statement, but it resonates with me. Trust and time are the most precious commodities. I lost over a decade in addictive addiction and the trust of everyone I loved and held dear. Working a program of recovery, I feel like I have accomplished more in a year than in that past decade and have gained the trust of my family and friends.
This past July 2024 was arguably the best month of my adult life. I married my incredible wife, became a stepfather, met my nephew and nieces for the first time, and forged a new bond between my family and my brother’s family. I had a family reunion in Minnesota, seeing family I hadn’t connected with in many years, and a cross-country road trip with my new stepsons. I achieved 18 months of continued sobriety a day at a time—all of these significant firsts.
Trust has been a gradual process over the past year and a half. It happens through connections and daily work based on spiritual principles – Honesty, faith, courage, integrity, duty, honor, and community. Through working a program of recovery and writing a thorough inventory of assets and defects, fears, harm caused to others, and sexual relations, sharing that with my sponsor and God, and then being willing to have those defects removed, I found a new sense of freedom and peace that I have never known or experienced before, and could make amends to those I harmed. I make living amends for those I could not meet or have passed on.
People can depend on me. My word is bond. I put in 100% and then some with an attitude of gratitude. I still make mistakes and have failures. I can embrace and accept that, learn, live, and move on. Every moment of every day is new and fresh, and I am continually learning.
